It is a crushing feeling to cry oneself to sleep
Aware that the tears are only there because they are.
To cry because one is crying,
To feel the breaking inside which results only from
And only in
Brokenness.
No step taken in contention with oneself seems quite to produce
A reconciliation,
But contend, we must.
In a senseless time, I long for hope,
Though I will settle
For a moment’s pause.
A breath that comes without shaking.
If I cannot have relief, then
Lord, contend with those
Who contend with me.
With me as I contend with my self.
(April 6, 2020)
